Nokia nightmare!

If I learn nothing else in life I should learn to adhere to the principle of 'if it ain't broke don't fix it'....specifically where Nokia is concerned!

I have been here countless times before but I never learn that when Nokia persistently harass me to update my phone's firmware.... it's just not going to be a good idea. I know it's not going to be a good idea, I have proven it to myself more times than I care to remember but the promise of the however unlikely possibility that a new firmware version might just include a new feature I can't possibly live without, is just too much to resist! This time I didn't even have any negative 'issues' with the version already running but even that couldn't dissuade me from falling into the Nokia trap!

One would like to think that a company with the size and market presence of Nokia would employ developers that could develop? I know I am being grossly naive in this preconception but I am ever stupid hopeful that just once a firmware version will actually manage to flash it's way happily and efficiently onto my phone and work!

Of course not, my naivety knows no bounds and so again this morning I have spent two hours, and I hasten to add after following Nokia's own instructions to the letter, not only trying to recover my phone back to it's original state after Nokia utterly annihilated it but this time also having to recover my laptop back to some semblance of it's former self!!!

I suppose I should really consider myself lucky, at least I did eventually manage to persuade it into recovery after umpteen attempts and some serious frustration. Yes, this is a good and lucky thing I promise you...... some previous efforts at this malarkey over the years have been known to render the receiving handset completely useless and fit only for a landfill site somewhere!


*On a more positive and completely unrelated note....I get to hook up with Lisa and Ian again tomorrow :o))

Best weekends and best friends!

What can I say? Amazing might begin cover it! I don't really have the words for just how it felt to finally get to meet Lisa after so many years of solely electronic communication but to those who suggest you can't actually know someone via the internet etc. one word comes to mind...codswallop! Lisa is Lisa, just like I knew she would be. :o)

The weekend was fabulous, it began with a manically excited woman (er...that would be myself), who having caught sight of Lisa and Ian pulling into the car park three floors below, shot out of the door, took the six flights of stairs four at a time and raced across said car park 'whooping' loudly to greet them! Hey, I waited over four years for this moment, there was absolutely no chance of me waiting any longer! :o)

After lots of hugs all round and some effort on my part not to dissolve into tears we made our way (only slightly more sedately) indoors....where almost immediately Hammy disgraced herself by greeting Lisa's finger with a bite sufficient to require a ten minute effort at stopping the copious bleeding! Me and this hamster are going to have a little talk on the issue of 'appropriate greetings' later!

First aid and band-aid having been administered the weekend progressed in a blur of chattering, laughing, eating and drinking....believe me Lisa and Leffe make a very amusing combination, I don't think I have laughed so much in my life as we tried to prop one another up in our efforts get to the bathroom in various establishments.....and really, you just don't know how difficult it can be to work out how the hand dryer operates!

Now Lisa will tell you it was she that was a little worse for wear....but it was me who spent five whole minutes trying to get into the wrong flat when we eventually returned home and I was only persuaded it was actually the wrong one when the resident on the other side of the door became concerned and I actually looked at the door number!! Ok, ok, I got out of the lift one floor early!

We talked and laughed late into the night, it felt like we had always been together in 'real life' but I couldn't help but keep wanting to pinch myself to believe it was actually happening!

On Sunday morning Lisa made us all the long promised breakfast of American pancakes... which were to die for. I don't do breakfast but I could change the habit of a lifetime for those. If anyone ever tells you pancakes, bacon and maple syrup aren't a good combination they are very wrong!....and yes, 40 years of vegetarianism has begun to slip a little I will admit. I blame Fletch...I was tee total too until I met him, the man has a corrupting influence! ;o)

We spent the afternoon wandering around Cambridge city center in true British fashion in the pouring rain and then all too soon it was time for them to leave. Where did the weekend go....surely that wasn't two days?? It couldn't possibly have been!

For logistical reasons we accompanied them to their next 'port of call' and then it was time to say goodbye :o( ....but not for long, we get to hook up again later in the week sometime :o)

Like I said at the start of this post...what can I say? Lisa is Lisa, my best friend, my 'sister', my confidante, the same person I have known for almost five years online...only better and it was just so special and so much fun to spend some time together and to meet Ian at last.

How do you say 'America is much too far away'?

We have to hatch a cunning plan.....

Should I stay or should I go?

My good friend JW posted this on his blog recently and I just had to repeat it here.

Both excellent and horrifying at the same time it says much about human nature that isn't good. I assume from the audience reaction it is supposed to be funny but it didn't leave me laughing. I can't say it surprises me sadly but it does bring home just how much ignorance, unkindness and prejudice there still is out there.

Very worth a watch....stick with it to the end.

The final approach!!

It's 5.30 in the morning, I have strong coffee, a cigarette, the Heathrow arrivals board online in front of me and he who is collecting Lisa at the gate is hopefully waiting there by now, having left to hit the motorway sometime in the wee small hours!

The flight is listed as only five minutes behind schedule so far and with any luck it will be just about to join the inevitable stack over London, if I were at my parents I would be able to see the aircraft about now!

Even at this hour I can hardly contain my excitement, more soon......


*UPDATE: 06.00: Flight listed at 06.15 and he who is there to meet her is at the gate! :o))


*06.13: Expected 06.17.


*06.14: LISA IS IN THE UK!!!....after all these years she is only 80 miles away, in the same country, yayyyyy!!! Yipeee!!! Woot!!!


**WELCOME TO ENGLAND LISA**


Can someone peel me off the ceiling now please?!!!!

Almost here!!

I
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AM
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SOOOOO
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EXCITED!!!

At 16.00hrs BST today Lisa begins her flight to the UK , she'll land at LHR in the small hours of tomorrow morning and will get here on Saturday!!!

I'll be tracking every mile of her journey on t'internet and be up at 4 tomorrow morning to 'watch' her plane land virtually! :o)

I can't believe it, the day is almost here at last! Yayyyyyyy :o)

Political correctness gone 'demented'!

It seems there is a bit of a hoo ha brewing at the University of Manchester, regarding the 'de-gendering' of the students union toilets.

If you haven't come across this little gem of a story before what it means in English is that the toilets are no longer marked as for men or women specifically, instead they are designated as 'toilets' or 'toilets with urinals'. The reason? There have been an unspecified number of complaints from trans-gender students that they have an issue as to which toilet they should use, or feel comfortable using.

I have no problem with that whatsoever, from a personal point of view I don't care whether men or women or women that live as men, or men that live as women, use the conveniences I use, in fact I think in many ways it would be more practical just to do as many other countries do and have 'unisex' toilets (have you see the queues in ladies toilets??) but I do understand why some individuals might find unisex toilets an uncomfortable concept and there is of course the 'has political correctness gone mad' phrase resounding around the whole issue.

And this is where the whole thing has aggravated me!

Check out the green haired, oh-so-idealist, students union rep in the linked video! Get a life girl. She, in typical over zealous, 'head in her rear end', extreme politically correct fashion, picks the reporter up on the use of the phrase' political correctness gone mad'! Her reasoning seems to be that to equate political correctness with madness is in itself not politically correct because the term 'mad' is a disable-ist (did she just invent that word?) term in itself!

That really is political correctness gone mad in my opinion, is the word 'mad' not just a general term for any extreme and/or unusual behaviour and often times applied to incidents of a fun or amusing nature, as opposed to a negative which appears to be her presumption? Perhaps she would prefer we used one of the many definitions of the word 'mad' (insert your choice of non disable-ist term - mentally disturbed; deranged; insane; demented) as supplied by the Oxford dictionary?

Sorry, but if she is being so bloody righteous is her association with madness and the those with a disability not a politically incorrect attitude in itself....and should she not be looking closer to home? You will notice if you listen carefully that one of the students states she "wouldn't like to share a toilet with a proper man"!!!! Does that suggest then that even some of those on her own campus are presenting a politically incorrect attitude towards trans-gender students?!

Give me strength, all she seems to have achieved is to take the spotlight off the original issue, which may or may not have validity but has been lost among the immature stupidity of someone who should know better by her own standards!!

I would suggest she should perhaps concentrate on educating those around her on the trans-gender issue rather than getting her five minutes of fame in front of a television camera!

Tesco - discounts that don't!

As a rule I do my grocery shopping online with Tesco and before I hear cries along the lines of 'lazy moo, she doesn't even go to work', I have what I at least consider to be a valid excuse for not trundling my way around the store!

As a bankrupt (albeit long since discharged) I am not allowed the privilege of plastic, I do two to four weeks shopping in a hit, I never know how much it will cost and I'll be damned if I am going to risk going through the performance of not having enough cash on me at the checkout....hence I do it online where Fletch's plastic will 'do very nicely sir' and as a bonus I also don't have to tolerate the screaming kids, wayward trolleys and isle-blockers who seem to enjoy spending their entire day in the place.

And if I'm honest, in the main the online service is excellent, with one exception, there's always one isn't there?

Over time I have received in my email various discount coupons, usually along the lines of 'you are a loyal customer here is a fiver off'. This week I had another, this one noting that I hadn't shopped with them for a time and they were sorry if they had displeased me in some way. They hadn't displeased me in any way, I had just been away on holiday....but they were about to displease me greatly!

The thing with these online coupons is that to date I have never managed to get one to actually work. They never work! In the past I have just ignored it but today my 'displeasure' got the better of me and determined, to just once actually get the discount, I called their helpline.

Hmmmmm. Helplines!

Suffice to say, I might suggest to Tesco that next time they run a training session for helpline staff they remind them that because a record of the emailed coupon in question seems not to be on their database, it doesn't automatically mean I am lying! I might also suggest that if that same system dictates that as a replacement it can only offer the customer an £8 voucher as opposed to the original £7.50 voucher, the helpline operator doesn't tell me with such gusto that this is 'bad for Tesco'!!! Somehow it is perhaps my fault that their software doesn't allow for the anomaly??

I think Tesco can stand the 50p don't you?

Jeez....what kind of customer service training do these people get??

They might not have pissed me off prior to my 'have we upset you' voucher but they certainly have now!

It's a rare day....

....that I wake up before the alarm and spring out of bed in a civil frame of mind and feeling positively full of beans from the off, but today I did just that! Why?

Well, in the first instance we had a fab weekend full of fun, food, friends and family and the merest hint of a possibility of something happening that would be 'heaven on a stick'! I won't go into details at this stage but should a small miracle occur and it actually transpire, you will be the first to know!

Secondly and more importantly, this is the week I have been waiting to arrive for what feels like forever, the week that sees my best friend Lisa arrive on UK soil at Heathrow for a visit and finally, after over four years of a continuous ten (or fifty) a day email conversation habit, we get to meet for real next Saturday!!!

In fact it seems impossible that we haven't already met in many ways, it's hard to believe that we haven't, it feels like we have, it feels like after all we have shared over the years we must have but now at last we are going too and I can't wait!! It's only 5 days away now and I am soooo excited I'm like a hyperactive five year old at Christmas!!!!

With passion!

At the beach

We are off again this evening for another weekend away, this time to the outlaws on the south coast which contrary to popular belief is a good thing, my outlaws are fab people.....hey I earned it, v1 through 3 were quite the reverse!

Add to that, it means time at the beach, much hilarity, yummy food and drink and even a cat, a big, fluffy, ginger cat, who of course will be made the most of and who will just have to sleep with us despite any protestations that may be offered up by Fletch!

Life could be a lot worse. :o)

....and it's only six days now until Lisa arrives!!!

Pretty pussy?

I'm sorry but be warned, despite the title this post has absolutely nothing to do with things feline and cute, rather it concerns the somewhat worrying upward trend there has apparently been of women seeking vaginoplasty or labiaplasty, surgery to improve the appearance and function of the female genitalia.

Have the women who choose to undergo this type of surgery gone completely nuts??

As an individual I wouldn't subject myself to surgery of any kind unless it was for the purpose of saving my life and whilst I appreciate I am maybe particularly cowardly where the surgeons knife is concerned, I am still at a loss to understand why I or anyone else would want to even consider vaginal surgery in most cases.

I do understand of course, that there are a few women for whom these procedures are medically appropriate, I won't go into too indelicate a list of specifics but perhaps for example, after a particularly physiologically traumatic child birth, but the fact is that the majority of those opting for this surgery do so purely for cosmetic reasons, I can only imagine is the result of media pressure to look good and a serious degree of personal insecurity about one's appearance.

It's bad enough that women feel the need to have breast augmentation, nose jobs, face lifts and numerous other kinds of body tucks but perhaps that is marginally more understandable, those body parts are at least visible to others as we go about our daily life and whilst I wouldn't do it, if it improves an individuals confidence in themselves then maybe, just maybe I can see the purpose. Vaginal surgery however is a whole different ball game.

Let's face it ladies, unless we are nubile young porn stars our genitalia is not generally on show and he or she to whom it is, has chosen to be there and therefor presumably finds whatever they are 'presented' with aesthetically acceptable. If they don't then I'm sorry but they can exit my bedroom post haste and go elsewhere.

Are we not individuals? Is that not the fun part?

We are all of different appearance and that applies to our entire body. I for one have no wish to be a clone and vaginoplasty not only strikes me as gruesome and entirely unnecessary in most instances, but it also seems very sad that anyone would even begin to consider it appropriate or suitable purely from a cosmetic aspect.

We can't escape the fact that when genitalia was invented it had more to do with function than aesthetics. Vaginas and penises where not at the top of the list when they hit the creation design studio but the rising popularity for surgery to create designer vaginas, is in my opinion, way too extreme and those considering it might want instead to consider a session of self esteem counselling before they hit the operating room!

Smile!

Along the way on our travels I caught one or two amusing bits on camera. By virtue of their immediacy the pictures aren't up to much but they might raise a smile.

1.Swiss traffic control!
2. A lorry that took a short cut, got stuck under a bridge and had a 100km detour to get to the other side.


3. A stork on a lampost, yes really, and.....
4. taking a stroll at a French service station!


5. Touring cyclists in Switzerland who's child transporting contraption actually housed a big and apparently very cheerful dog and...
6. a three legged dog?!


And lastly
7. Sex and
8. Champagne for sale at the services....why do services in the UK not sell anything as interesting?!


(All clickable)

Ten things I learned in Europe!

1. In Southern Italy you are not utilising a 50cc scooter appropriately unless you are carrying at least 2 adults, 2 children, one or more dogs or items of livestock and a months groceries!

2. Dehydration is not fun and turns what were perfectly adequate legs into something uncontrollably useless.

3. If you're not kicking the ass of 100mph on the motorways stay firmly on the inside lanes....except in France where there is suddenly an over-zealous influx of gatzo wielding cops.

4. Fletch can build a pretty fine dam!

5. You don't realise how patient and polite we Brits are sometimes until you have been to Italy.

6. Lonely Planet phrase books always have the phrases you don't need (that was good for me how was it for you? 'romance section') but not the phrases you do need like 'where is the bathroom please'?!

7. Using a German washing machine is not simple when you don't speak the language and results in much frustration.

8. If you smile sweetly at customs when they choose your car to pull apart and syphon you off into a dark corner, you can change their minds and just be wished a good holiday!

9. Tampons in Switzerland cost £6 for 20!!!

10. Belgian waffles (with chocolate and cream of course) are to absolutely to die for.

Reality bites

That's it then, the holiday is over and apparently today is the first day of autumn, or so Google inform me. Certainly here it's looking pretty autumnal, we woke for the first time this season to mist on the river and a definate chill in the air.

Fletch has pottered off to work with the 'first day back' miseries and his face tripping him and for me it's back to the hamster for company and a renewal of my efforts at finding a way to make a living, though I do have a new plan, which may soon become apparent.

So, reality bites in gemmak's-ville again, though with some pretty good memories and the next highlight to look forward to....it's only ten days now until Lisa arrives in the UK!

I can't wait!