Fat face!

Hopefully this will be the singularly most unflattering picture I will ever post here so if you have a mind to crack jokes take your chance now, the fact that my head appears to be rectangular I hope is down to the poor lens on my phone, the rest,well it is what it is!

As anyone who has visited here before will know (only too well I hear you mutter)I have some significant dental issues, the teeth all look fine but they are far from it. In part it's just misfortune, I have always taken good care of them but in larger part it's down to the inefficiency of the N.H.S. dental services and in my opinion, the greed of dentists. I won't regale you with the years of problems I have had, the are well documented here already and as ever I suspect the word 'greed' and 'dentists' in one sentence will lay me open again to comment hassle from the profession but it is a fact, yet again I am suffering because the dentist I currently have wouldn't carry out the treatment at N.H.S. charges (I am an N.H.S. patient), preferring instead to require me to pay the private fee of just short of £2000...or no deal! Gotta love the caring professions!

Anyhow, all that aside, Christmas Eve saw me begin to 'nurture' yet another abscess, hey, I'm used to the damn things, I have emergency antibiotics always on stand-by and I duly began the course but this one it transpired, was to be the mother of all abbesses and it paid little heed to the meds, in fact no heed at all and by Christmas morning the 'Fat Face' had grown to it's almost full glory.

I can honestly say I have never known pain like it. It was utterly horrible and not what I had asked Santa for at all!. Christmas Day was a wash out, I did manage to suck my way through the soft bits of a Christmas lunch but aside from that I spent most of the day either on the phone to N.H.S. Direct or waiting for their dentist to call me back. I was trying to ignore the 'comforting' words of my own dentist that one can expire from this ailment and even if I had I felt inclined too I couldn't even raise a smile....my mouth wouldn't move in the smile direction.

The long and the short of it is that I was referred to A & E, who much to my chagrin took the whole situation scarily too seriously for my liking but ultimately posted me back out the door with two types of antibiotics and a string of other instructions and pain meds. In total I was taking, until yesterday, 23 tablets a day. I don't do pain meds! Well not usually but really, this time it was off my usual coping scale.

I now merely sport a rather large gob-stopper in the side of my face, my eye and my chin seem to have reappeared, I am down to 18 tablets and I have an appointment late next week with a new dentist the hospital recommended.

Oh hell, now all I have to do is face the fear, it's going to be two root canals and an extraction is my best guess but I'm trying not to think about it......yet :(

....but on the positive side, though my holiday has been crap, it would have been a whole lot worse to have to go to work feeling like this!

Happy Christmas....

.....may it be peaceful and lovely and and full of everything you wish for.

Thank God it's Christmas!

The last few weeks have been pretty tough going in gemmak's-ville one way and another. The pressures on my time between trying function at work, take care of my mum, fit in all the getting ready for Christmas stuff and find time to spend with 'N' have been immense and there have been moments when I felt that all the balls in my personal piece of air might well come crashing down around me.

I discovered that working outside in sub zero temperatures form 5am each day fighting the the snow and ice is very hard work, I feel literally 'assailed' by the elements at the end of it and my love of snow has, I will admit has waned a little on and off. I have landed on my rear on more than one occasion, I have been cluttered up in so many layers I could hardly move, I have spent more time than I care to remember with my now trusty shovel in hand digging either my car or my van out and I have scared myself half to death hitting, black ice late at night a day or two ago and suddenly finding myself doing a rather spectacular 360 along the A40! Luckily because of the time there was little traffic around to avoid and I managed to regain control before I hit anything static either.

I don't recommend it however!

I'm reasonably experienced, I know the 'driving on ice and snow' rules and I employed the given tactics but it happened in a split second and was completely beyond my control for what felt like far too long.

Give me snow every time, it's a walk in the park in comparison to ice.

But hopefully all the hassle is over now for a while. I have twelve days off work, my mother is mainly in the care of my siblings for the next three days and I am spending Christmas with 'N'. It's still all a bit odd without my dad, he was usually the motivating force in our family Christmas's but that's a done deal, life changes and swe have to try to change with it.

All I have to attend to now is the present wrapping issue, I bought cards but they remain unwritten in boxes so my apologies if you usually get one, this year you won't. I have one or two items I need to try and buy later today and then hopefully life will calm down for a few days.


Thank God it's Christmas.....

Tis the season to be......?

I was charged today with the task of sourcing the household Christmas tree and to be entirely honest I wasn't looking forward to it. The last few years I have gone with my dad to the local 'Christmas tree farm' (yes, we have one called just that) and it has been a something of a tradition for he and I......this year was obviously going to be different and not in a good way.

I did endeavour to get said tree from elsewhere but to no avail and so I took the bull by it's proverbial horns and this afternoon went on my own to do the deed.

My father, a man of immense integrity - annoyingly so at times - must have been spying on me because having selected a suitable tree and paid for it I realised that instead of charging my card with the full £22 price, they had charged just £2!

I will fess up here, there was some intent in my mind to walk away feeling pleased with myself, I even began to leave the pay point but somehow I just couldn't....and half way out of the place I turned on my hell, went back and pointed out their error. Dammit!

Their gratitude and praise for my honesty only served to make me feel more guilty for my momentary lapse!

On a more positive note, my initial anticipated sadness was lessened by the discovery of these two beautiful and very large creatures who apparently now reside at the tree farm over the festive period....


(Apologies for quality, phone cam.)

How to wrap a cat for Christmas!

Love it! :)

Ejaculation not allowed!

Picture the scene, it's Christmas night, the family, myself, my mother, my sister and her husband and the two teenage children, plus one miscellaneous boyfriend are sitting around the table playing the obligatory Christmas games. There are carols playing gently in the background and all is relatively peaceful.

The game, don't ask me to name it, involved making models from 'play-doh', one person per team modelling the damn stuff against the clock, the other guessing the word the model represents.

There was some small degree of cheating going on and in the excitement of the moment my modeller, youngest teenage child, tried to indicate to me what it was she was modelling, exasperated at my apparent lack of ability to identify the blue 'blob' infront of her.

Oldest teenage child at this point, much miffed at the bending of rules was heard to shout across the room at hight decibel levels and in all innocence........."you are not allowed to ejaculate".

I suspect the word she was looking for was probably'gesticulate'.

There was one of those silent moments, offending teenager utterly confused and the rest of us trying our damnedest not to fall about hysterically.

We failed dismally!

Love it!

Done and dusted

Well that's that done and dusted and over with, Christmas is behind us and I have to admit I am not sorry. I know that's pretty much of a 'bah humbug grumpy bint' attitude but there it is, it wasn't my best festive season by a long way!

We did I have to say, make the best of it and being with my sister and her family made it a whole lot better but for all of us it's our first 'event' without my dad and for me my first for a very long while single, definitely a status I am learning to dislike intensely and particularly at holiday times. It just isn't nice. I know there are many that hail female independence in the 21st century, yada, yada, yada but it just isn't for me, I wasn't built to be a solitary soul in this manner and whilst I may be getting used to it, I have no wish whatsoever to tolerate the single life for long!

Hey ho, onward. We have the new year to get through and then maybe some semblance of normality can begin to resume. What my normality will be now I have no idea but my life is set to change again quite significantly over the next few months.

Did I mention I am fed up with change? A spell of stability might be nice for a while.....I'm not holding my breath!

Merry Christmas!

It's official....

...that I have failed dismally this Christmas one way and another and as a result I should apologise here and now!

What for?

Well, I haven't so much as purchased a Christmas card, let alone written or posted any, so if you would normally expect to be seeing one from me popping through your letter box, I am sorry but it won't be happening this year. I'll say again, I'm am sorry but pressure of circumstances and all that, I just didn't seem to get to it. In fact Christmas is pretty low key here this year for obvious reasons. None of us can really get into it so my mum and I will head off to Leicestershire tomorrow to stay with my sister for a few days, we will do Christmas for the children but that will be about the extent to which we go, it will just be nice to be together.

So, again, my apologies but not much festive to see here this year.

How many cats?

This little festive offering amused me...but don't expect me to know the answer to 'how many cats'...each time I count them I come up with a different result!

If you think you have the definitive answer, let me know!


*Update.
As has been pointed out to me in comments it's twelve, as in the twelve days of Christmas! Duh @ me. Hey, I told you my brain is addled recently but I like the picture just the same! :o)

Three wishes for Christmas

I thieved this from The Pink Jellybaby....it seems somewhat more cheerful than my recent offerings, a chance to daydream.

I don't think I'll be doing Christmas in any significant way this year, me and mine just can't really get into it this time around, but the thought of having three wishes granted about now is pretty appealing.

Ok, so as ever with these things do I go for the bigger picture or do I go for the selfish 'me' wishes option? I think I fancy the latter if I'm honest on this occasion so here goes, my three wishes for Christmas are:

1. My knight in shining armour to finally appear complete with white horse. Hell, dammit, sod the white horse and the armour, if he loves the real me and I love him the rest is academic!

2. A kitten, any kitten, I'm not fussy. I'll have the runt of the litter, it can have three legs and a bent ear, really I don't care, just a kitten! Perhaps though a home to keep it in first might be a plan.

3. Something nice to happen, one of those things, not necessarily a big thing, just something small that makes me feel deep down happy for a few minutes, I'm fed up now with the sad crap.

If anyone out there feels kind enough to grant one of the above please feel free. :o)

Here's wishing you all a...

Was that Christmas then?

So... Here I am blogging from my phone somewhere on the M1 heading north to Yorkshire to visit a critically ill relative. Christmas day was good but by early boxing day things had begun to go pear shaped in a pretty big way and since then, if something could go wrong it seems to have done so spectacularly, resulting in most of our time being spent on the road!

Christmas seems a long time ago now, in fact I'm not sure it happened at all did it? The chance to stop travelling and sleep in my own bed can't come quickly enough right now but with a bit of luck another 500 miles should do it... I'm not counting my chickens thought, the last few days have proven that not to be the wisest of moves!

Happy Christmas everyone!

Let the fun begin!

At last the madness and mayhem of the pre-Christmas panic is almost over and the fun can begin! The parcels are wrapped, the comestibles are purchased, Fletch's car is back from it's repairs, the horrible hire car is history and Punctuation is at Heathrow as I type, waiting to board his flight to the U.S. and Lisa anytime now, it's all coming together!

I have a few bits to finish up and then we hit the road for Christmas with my parents and the rest of my immediate family, it will be the first time in years we have all managed to get together in one place and it should be pretty cool.

We then have to race back home on Boxing day to check Hammy is ok. I don't like leaving her alone for more than a day or two but I have no Hammy sitter so the extra 200 miles is a necessary evil....though I doubt she will even wake up long enough to notice we are there!

Then having re-stocked the Hammy food bowl etc. it's a quick turnaround and back on the road for the south coast and a couple of days of festive fun with Fletch's family and friends.

So that's it, we got there in the end, the madness is over, now let the fun begin......

I'll be back soon, or via my phone if I have the time or inclination, but until then....

Happy Christmas, have yourselves a fab one guys!

Al I want for Christmas is.....

Ultra lazy post today, sorry! ;o)

Tis the season to be.....

..... dressed up like a dogs bloody dinner and have to play the corporate game!

Yes, tonight sees Fletch's Christmas 'works bash' take place and you can probably tell I'm not looking forward to it with too much glee! It sounds ok I will grant you, dinner at the Hilton, free bar all night and gratis taxi's in each direction but the likely reality is that the dinner will be a portion control, mass produced, luke-warm affair and a free bar always has a habit of resulting in problems of the sick bucket kind! If I remember correctly, the sick bucket facility was required only half way through the evening last year and then was hotly pursued by a need for the paramedics to be called. This was not for myself or Fletch I hasten to add!

The whole issue does nothing for me, call me boring but I don't like getting dressed up and having to contend with heels and the like and I particularly dislike the whole corporate forelock tugging malarkey, it's just not my bag and nor is it Fletch's but it has to be done. I just don't understand the whole principle of having to pay homage to the boss(s), they are people like you and me, ok, unlike me they are successful from a professional point of view but they are still just people, not demi-gods, and I would hope I show respect to everyone, the fact that these particular individuals are rich and successful doesn't make them better or worse.

But hey ho (or should that be Ho Ho Ho) it can't be avoided and this year we are at least grateful in the current financial climate that the business is sound and that Fletch has a job at all.... so we will dutifully tug our forelocks, make polite and boring conversation and hope that at least the free bar takes the edge off it all!

Tis the season to be grumpy merry tra la la la la la laaaaaaa....... ;o)

Deck the halls....

....with not very much!

If I'm honest we had decided that this year anything in the Christmas tree line was a waste of money that could be better spent, we won't be here for the festivities in any case, but then last minute we considered something small might be less 'bah humbug' than nothing at all! As a result, yesterday we braved the pre-Christmas crowds in an attempt at securing for ourselves a small tree. Our efforts were thwarted though, the small Christmas tree cupboards were bare.....so not to be off put, I tied the one bauble we own (and that's only because my mother bought it for me last week) to a lamp and......voila, decorations done!

Are you impressed? ;o)

Hey, minimalist is good!

Christmas is done - ish!

What a relief! We decided yesterday that there was no point stressing about the lack of Christmas organisation in gemmak's-ville and then doing precisely sod all about it, so yesterday we bit the bullet and headed off early (well early for us on a Saturday morning) to face the demon Christmas crowds in Milton Keynes!

And demon they were, nothing less than the expected nightmare greeted us but we focused on the task at hand, though Fletch might not agree I was as focused as I should have been given my proclivity to wander off the straight and narrow to check out 'me stuff' now and again!!

But persevere we did and by 5pm we exited into the cold, dark evening, complete with ninety percent of everything we need for the Christmas tussle in a few weeks time. Ok, we were jiggered and somewhat 'fraught', there had been the usual 'man out shopping domestic exchanges of opinion' (what is it with guys and shopping??) here and there but we had it almost all done, in one hit! Result!

Add to that, we managed to hook up with Punctuation for a quick coffee and a natter early on in the proceedings and then decided on our homeward journey that we deserved to go via a bar for dinner and a beer as our reward! ;o)

It's all good, ....save now for a lingering headache and the fact that Fletch, having had to spend his Saturday in retail hell, has now had to go into work for the rest of his weekend! Ooopsss.

Too soon was the cry!

Christmas that is! How is it that the Christmas's of recent years have developed this nasty habit of stealth? They seem to creep up on me silently and then suddenly pounce, taking me by surprise and causing a state of last minute panic. I used to be organised, I used to have every last detail planned with military precision.... but no longer it seems. There is only twenty one days left now until the zero hour and I am apparently completely incapable of getting my mind into any semblance of Christmas order whatsoever. It's just coming way too soon and I'm not ready for it, at all!

Not so much as a card has been purchased let alone written, our brief endeavour at getting a tree fell into disarray within minutes when we both lost patience with the pushing and shoving hordes of a Sunday afternoon's retail delight and try as I might, I am utterly clueless and without inspiration as to what might be provided as gifts for one and all. Despite hours surfing the interweb for ideas and scanning pages of glossy catalogues that promise to solve all my present problems I have achieved nothing, nada, zip!

I suspect, this year, as last, the situation will only be resolved by a week or two more of blind panic, of trying to shoe-horn myself into the Christmas spirit and then finally, with only a day or two left, making a mad and protracted dash around Milton Keynes shopping mall and spending way too much money because nothing suitable in the gift line is ever within pre-defined budgets! That of course will then be followed by mad dash number two, the one to get all the wrapping and bow tying done and the cards delivered by hand, because of course, I will also have missed the final posting dates!

A final bout of festive panic and mayhem will then doubtless ensue when the sudden realisation hits me that I have forgotten a gift for someone or am missing another item of utmost importance for the (tongue firmly in cheek) 'perfect Christmas experience'..... at a point only hours from having to look cool, collected, serene and full of Christmas cheer and joy!

Panic, panic, panic.

Bah bloody humbug!