"Take back the web"

I am beginning to become seriously tempted to!

For those of you who don't have a geek in their lives who often times can be found 'sporting' various items of geek-wear emblazoned with appropriately geeky slogans, "take back the web" was/is an advertising slogan for Firefox.

Against all attempts at persuasion I have resisted migrating to the aforementioned browser, in the main because the time I spend fiddling with designs and code would mean I would need to run both browsers far more often than I do now and let's face it, for good or evil, the majority still use I.E. so I would rather get it right there first.

That said, since the enforcement of Vista in my life and the impact that appears to have on I.E. (none of it good) I am finding it harder and harder to resist the lure of Firefox......the fact that it just works is a kind of an attractive prospect!

No sh*it?!

Unemployment has risen in the UK by 14000 in the three months to March.

Actually it's risen to at least 14001 because I for one am not registered as unemployed and doubtless there are many more like me who for one reason or another have chosen not to register, or have by manipulation of government statistics and methods of collecting those statistics, also not been included.

Recession? Of course not, just ask Gordy, I'm sure he'll have some cock and bull rhetoric to disprove the glaringly obvious!

A pointless exercise

Eleven o'clock yesterday morning, ailing somewhat in the female department and feeling less than chipper, I received a phone call from one of the employment agencies I am registered with...could I make it for an interview at 12!

I hesitated momentarily considering that to get myself from a state of the great unwashed and sporting a fine birds nest on my head to 'interview condition' and make the ten mile dash to somewhere I had never been before (navigation is not my forte and my car is lucky to have a steering wheel let alone sat. nav.) from the mental and physical point of decrepitude I was at, was a feat far greater than I was likely to achieve.

But of course as fast as I hesitated I told myself to get a grip, even a three month contract was worth a shot so I hauled myself through the showering and suiting and booting process, transformed the birds nest, poked some paracetamol down my neck and floored my little car in the appropriate direction.

Luck was on my side and with no traffic problems evident and an unusually effective attempt at navigation I made it with time to spare. The adrenaline of rushing about like a mad woman had thankfully bought my senses back to something approaching compis mentis and it seemed that amazingly I had gathered myself from 'slob status' to 'interview ready status' in less than an hour!

The interview, as far as one can ever tell, went well and I emerged feeling reasonably proud of my effort and with a promise that I would hear if I had been successful in the late afternoon.

I did and I wasn't!

Apparently this time it seems I was over qualified!! FFS!!

It has never entered my head that I should need to dumb down to secure myself employment, let's face it, I'm not any competition for Einstein and I'm still trying to decide exactly how, when the contract is only for three months, it would actually matter anyway.

What a waste of time and effort!

Blogiversary!

Hells bells, 'gemmak' is four years old today!

I'm sure when I started this blogging malarkey I didn't ever anticipate I would still be at it four years later, but it seems I am and it would appear I owe you lot a vote of thanks for having the fortitude to keep on reading it all that time!

I'm still not sure why I do it, sometimes I love it, sometimes it has felt like a millstone around my neck but mostly it's just a part of my life now and one that for the most part I would miss. It's caused me some hassles along the way but it's also made me some very good friends, provided me with support when I needed it, given me a place to rant through the tough times and celebrate in the good ones and it has been directly responsible for changing some aspects of my life completely.

So...thanks guys for hanging around, another four years? Who knows..... ;o)

Now I remember....

....why I was tee-total for twenty five years!

This morning I seem to have a hangover, or at least I'm assuming that's what it is, it's not good, I don't like it.

bleugh!

Ok, no more words, I can't do words today, a picture instead, from a few days back, don't recall exactly when....

Shortlisted

Wow...two good things in one week! What's going on?

First the crap car surpassed itself in passing it's MOT test and now Schmap have shortlisted one of my photographs to accompany one of it's articles.

This doesn't of course catapult me to David Bailey status, it doesn't involve any payment (though I would get credit and a link) and the final decision is yet to be made but to even be shortlisted is quite pleasing. :o)

The crap car!

After much professional advice to the contrary and in the full knowledge that by my own investigations much was wrong 'the crap car' (you perhaps have to read 'A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian' by Marina Lewycka to find that phrase funny) it amazingly managed to drag itself, kicking and screaming, through an M.O.T. test yesterday........ and passed!!

I am still stunned! The car God's must have been smiling on me!

I had gone in there very well aware that should it fail on what I suspected it would then this was probably the end of the road (pardon the pun) for it, given that my none existent meagre bank account was not going to be able to even contemplate the bill.

This was not going to be a happy moment and nor was it going to assist the employment search. As it was it turned into one of those ridiculously elated moments and I suspect that the guy testing it was a little taken aback by my reaction to the news, which I have to confess involved some degree of jumping up and down!
Yes, it does still need a fair number of repairs, the cost of which is way beyond me right now but none of them were severe enough to cause a fail and all of them can wait a little longer for the necessary attention. I might add that this is not new where this car is concerned, I bought it new and almost from the day the warranty expired it began to fall apart, I have never had so much trouble with a car in my life, I think I have replaced almost every part over the last few years...some of them twice and most of it documented here over the years!

It may be a crap car, it may be 'getting on a bit', slow, boring and most other things one doesn't normally want in a car but to me it's pretty important, it's gets me from A to B, it's about the only possession I haven't lost over the last few years having fought the bankruptcy courts hard to keep it, it feels somehow like my last bit of independence and it's mine and the only one I've got!

Today I love my crap car! :o)

Incidentally, if you haven't read 'A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian' you should, it's without doubt the best book I ever read and utterly hilarious in a strange way.

The definition of a true friend....

....is the one, who when life is giving you a hard time and you send them mail at 2am bemoaning your woes, not only reads that mail but responds to it at an equally unearthly hour, with coherence and sense!

Thank you.... you know who you are.

So you think you know your movies?

As a self confessed movie dunce, or at least with a mind that seems only to retain information for a nano-second these days, I didn't do too well with Fletch's latest offering....a 50 movie sound clip montage, I scored only 25!

If you wanna have a bash and see how many you can name it's HERE.

Cat fight!

The following quote is taken from an article by the BBC today concerning why teenage girls are more frequently becoming involved in physical fights than they did previously and why that might shock or surprise us. The girl quoted has more than 20 violent offences to her name:

"It's only when I've had a drink and I think I'm on top of the world and I think I can take on everybody. I know I shouldn't but I can't help myself when I've had a drink."

Perhaps I'm just getting old but there seems something of a glaringly simple solution, at least in part, to this individuals behaviour, does there not? Doubtless she suffers any number of other social issues and problems but a little less alcohol might be a start! Ok, so now I'm beginning to get myself into much deeper issues and perhaps she drinks because of those issues but none the less my knee jerk reaction still is just..... jeez!

....and just for the record I would feel the same if it were a guy being quoted.

An engineers guide to cats

This is very funny...well I think so at least! ;o)

I suspect...

....that Mr Brown is laughing on the other side of his face this morning!


Let's face it, the last two days have not been the finest in his career but then by now he should be getting used to it having managed quite spectacularly to end any career he might have had within weeks (was it even that long?) of his moving into number 10!

Surely not even copious amounts of spin and rhetoric can't save him from the dogs now.

Even Boris the buffoon has made his way the top spot in London, if I were Gordy I think I would be house hunting this morning...assuming of course his bank will give him a mortgage! ;o)

Excuse my sniggering.

Five tips for a woman

1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.

2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man you can count on! And doesn't lie to you.

4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.

5. It is important that these four men don't know each other.


Sorry, it's an old one I know but I couldn't resist!

Paranoia!

Twice a year the letting agents that manage the flat we live in send someone round by appointment to check that we are keeping the property in the manner stated on the lease. We are of course, those who have read this blog will know I am on the OTT side anyway when it comes to being clean and tidy but nonetheless, in the sure and certain knowledge that today was 'inspection' day I thought it best I make an extra effort.

Not knowing what time of day this visit was to take place I began early getting the place absolutely spick and span......you know, doing all those little jobs you always 'mean' to do, like getting the carpet absolutely pristine, cleaning the outside of the windows not just the inside, giving the paintwork a quick once over and polishing the laminate flooring rather than just giving it a quick look at a mop.

Now when I say we adhere closely to the rules laid down in the lease, did I forget to mention um...just the one anomaly?

This is a 'no smoking' property, or at least that's what it is supposed to be, in practice though that is very much not the case. The pair of us smoke like troopers.

Mindful of this most wicked and heinous of breaches and only too aware of the lingering smell etc. I had the windows and doors open all day despite there being a distinct chill in the air, I burned scented candles, I squirted copious amounts of doubtlessly environmentally very unfriendly air fresheners about the place, I utilised all manner of 'clean smelling' solutions for my cleaning activities and worst of all, I had to trail up and down three floors to access the great outdoors (ok, I took the lift back up), every time I wanted a demon cigarette!

.......only to find that when the guy finally arrived he wasn't here more than 15 seconds and his inspection was so perfunctory that I doubt he would have noticed had there been an elephant parked in the middle of the living room!

Next time I won't be quite so paranoid!