Today I have the dubious pleasure of finally attending court to give evidence against the shoplifter who caused me to have run a small marathon way back last September. Oh joy!
After all the months of hoo ha, the problems with dates, the threats of my arrest for contempt of court and the complete ineptitude of the CPS at last the case has made it's weary way to court....doubtless only to be adjourned for some social report or small technicality and thereby wasting everyone's day.
Can you tell that any feeling of public duty I might once have had is faltering badly? Do I want to do it? Do I hell....I can think of a thousand things I would rather be doing but I suppose I really ought to go get myself suited and booted and and head off........though the temptation not to and remain here instead with coffee in hand is strong, I promise you.
Hey ho....you never know, the defendant might even show up!
Monday, 15 May 2006
Sunday, 14 May 2006
Sunday stupidity
As I had a rare Saturday off work yesterday (and yes it was fab, I could get used to it) I had time to type a 'real' post and the usual Saturday Silliness, my quick fix at 5am on a work Saturday, was abandoned.....as a consequence this week you get Sunday stupidity instead....less sighing please!
So, courtesy of my mail box and JW....go have a giggle at THIS if you have a moment. :o)
So, courtesy of my mail box and JW....go have a giggle at THIS if you have a moment. :o)
Saturday, 13 May 2006
Really, paranoia is setting in!
Just what is it with me and the hairdressers?...is it God's punishment for my utter dislike of the whole performance, is it that I'm expecting too much in that just once I would like it to be a straight forward affair or am I justified in a modicum of paranoia beginning to set in!
Yes, again yesterday it was that day, the most heinous of days when I could no longer ignore the fact that my once well trimmed head was becoming something of an attraction for the local ornithological population as a possible nesting site......and so the much dreaded and put off hairdressers visit had to be faced.
Regulars here will recall my previous near disasters in these emporiums, where in my case, far from being pampered and preened I am usually subjected to one small aggravation or trauma after another. Not only is it bad enough that I have to be subjected to the horrors of the backwash, the inane 'where are you going on holiday this summer' chatter and the appalling coffee...no, for me there have of late also been various other 'attractions' to make my visit moreinsufferable pleasing.
Things did at least get off to a better start this time than the last in that I managed to find the place without making an utter fool of myself with the local constabulary but the situation began to degenerate rapidly from there on in.
Upon walking through the door I was met with a slightly strange look, you know, one of those moments when you just know something is not quite right but you are at a loss to place your digit on exactly why. I was greeted politely but then nothing, none of the 'can I take your coat' (ok I wasn't wearing one but hey...) or would you like autterly awful cup of coffee standard walk through the door questions. My stylist, Fiona, just looked at me slightly confused....before asking eventually if I would like to make an appointment!! This was patently not a good beginning. Already feeling a degree of exasperation setting in I explained that I had an appointment, at which she looked at her book blankly and returned 'no you don't'. Much discussion followed but eventually my being able to tell her with whom I spoke on the phone etc. a degree of belief gradually set in.....bear in mind here the place was almost empty and just getting on with the hair cutting business was not going to present a problem with clients queued out the door!! Finally the source of the error was discovered, the dippy bint who has taken my call had placed me in someone else's schedule, and things got under way with my being (now more politely) fastened into the torturous backwash.....oh my favourite moment, having the blood to my brain cut off for ten minutes whilst my head is subjected to various positions and usually unskilled attempts at head massage. Ten minutes, you gotta be kidding, things began to go from bad to worse!
This establishment is not the most salubrious of salons, it's staff whilst nice, could maybe benefit from a little customer service training, I go there for one reason only, the girl with the scissors knows what she's doing.....those with the shower head are somewhat lacking in the finer points of attentive service and whilst being subjected to the neck breaking experience have a habit of talking among themselves over the clients head....and worse.
So there I am, completely powerless, draped in the various delightful gowns and towels, head bent unnaturally backwards just wishing the whole process could be over before my head falls off and her with the shampoo on her hands suddenly stops, dries her hands....and begins texting someone!! I begin to feel the possibility of a curt interjection here but decide to shut up in the hope that she will return to her task the sooner. Texting over she then begins a conversation about the content of the text with a colleague, a girl who looks about 12 years of age (ok, so I'm showing my age)as the conversation progresses thankfully so does the hairwashing, along finally with the standard question, 'would I like a coffee'. In a state of beginning desperation I decide to risk it, at the rate this visit is unfolding I'm gonna need something to keep me awake! This prompts the twelve year old into some kind of action other than chatter and text and she unplugs the kettle situated in the same room and in one movement marches over to the back wash at which I am currently suffering my torture (there is another but she ignores it), grabs the shower hose from her colleague and jams the kettle under it for filling.....hitting me on the head twice in the process!! There is no apology, no 'Oh I'm terribly sorry madam are you alright', nope nothing, her reaction is that of someone who provides cranial assault as an extra service to each client! Ok, my patience is somewhat thin at this point and I feel it necessary to point out that this is not really an idea treatment...she did apologise, her customer service skills I thought were finally coming into play but no....as swiftly as she apologised she offered an excuse.....that the kettle wouldn't fit in the basin with my head .....FFS....yes, I know sunshine, that point was obvious even to me it was my bloody head you attempted to remove in your endeavors, my sarcasm was lost and I shut up deciding that to point out there was another basin would only be further wasting my time.
Things settled for a minute or two and the head scrubbing began again in earnest as the kettle began to boil noisily in the background. Things were not to remain calm. Moments later my twelve year old abuser screamed and ran to the doorway shouting 'look at the cup' look at that cup'!! Shampoo girl immediately stopped shampooing again and I struggled from my unnatural position....we looked at the cup, yes, sure as eggs is eggs it was a cup, white, pot thing with handle, hanging on a mug tree...we were at a loss to know exactly what it was we were supposed to be noticing.....twelve year old enlightened us rapidly in a near hysterical tone before running out of the room completely, all thoughts of my coffee forgotten. The mug was swinging gently in its place,now to you or me this might seem not to be a point of note but apparently we would be very wrong for twelve year old was utterly convinced that this was a case of the paranormal.....that the mug was swinging entirely unaided, there could be no other explanation than she was in the presence of a ghost...there would of course be no possibility that she had knocked it, it being in close proximity to the kettle and her other antics! She would not be convinced and remained dithering in the doorway .......Ok, so enough already with as much calmness in my voice as I could muster I reminded shampoo girl that I was still dripping infront of her, informed her that a second lathering and conditioner would not be required and please, could she just get this stuff off my damn head and let the lady with the scissors at me!
She dared to look slightly affronted at my tone but at last did the necessary and released me from my torture! Oh.... and the coffee never did materialize but I thought better of risking a repeat of that debacle again!
Surely, just one time I can pay a visit to a hairdressers and it be simple....yup, paranoia is definitely beginning to set in!
Please note: gratuities were not bestowed!....but I have pre-empted the usual requests for a picture of the result this time. ;oP
Yes, again yesterday it was that day, the most heinous of days when I could no longer ignore the fact that my once well trimmed head was becoming something of an attraction for the local ornithological population as a possible nesting site......and so the much dreaded and put off hairdressers visit had to be faced.
Regulars here will recall my previous near disasters in these emporiums, where in my case, far from being pampered and preened I am usually subjected to one small aggravation or trauma after another. Not only is it bad enough that I have to be subjected to the horrors of the backwash, the inane 'where are you going on holiday this summer' chatter and the appalling coffee...no, for me there have of late also been various other 'attractions' to make my visit more
Things did at least get off to a better start this time than the last in that I managed to find the place without making an utter fool of myself with the local constabulary but the situation began to degenerate rapidly from there on in.
Upon walking through the door I was met with a slightly strange look, you know, one of those moments when you just know something is not quite right but you are at a loss to place your digit on exactly why. I was greeted politely but then nothing, none of the 'can I take your coat' (ok I wasn't wearing one but hey...) or would you like a
This establishment is not the most salubrious of salons, it's staff whilst nice, could maybe benefit from a little customer service training, I go there for one reason only, the girl with the scissors knows what she's doing.....those with the shower head are somewhat lacking in the finer points of attentive service and whilst being subjected to the neck breaking experience have a habit of talking among themselves over the clients head....and worse.
So there I am, completely powerless, draped in the various delightful gowns and towels, head bent unnaturally backwards just wishing the whole process could be over before my head falls off and her with the shampoo on her hands suddenly stops, dries her hands....and begins texting someone!! I begin to feel the possibility of a curt interjection here but decide to shut up in the hope that she will return to her task the sooner. Texting over she then begins a conversation about the content of the text with a colleague, a girl who looks about 12 years of age (ok, so I'm showing my age)as the conversation progresses thankfully so does the hairwashing, along finally with the standard question, 'would I like a coffee'. In a state of beginning desperation I decide to risk it, at the rate this visit is unfolding I'm gonna need something to keep me awake! This prompts the twelve year old into some kind of action other than chatter and text and she unplugs the kettle situated in the same room and in one movement marches over to the back wash at which I am currently suffering my torture (there is another but she ignores it), grabs the shower hose from her colleague and jams the kettle under it for filling.....hitting me on the head twice in the process!! There is no apology, no 'Oh I'm terribly sorry madam are you alright', nope nothing, her reaction is that of someone who provides cranial assault as an extra service to each client! Ok, my patience is somewhat thin at this point and I feel it necessary to point out that this is not really an idea treatment...she did apologise, her customer service skills I thought were finally coming into play but no....as swiftly as she apologised she offered an excuse.....that the kettle wouldn't fit in the basin with my head .....FFS....yes, I know sunshine, that point was obvious even to me it was my bloody head you attempted to remove in your endeavors, my sarcasm was lost and I shut up deciding that to point out there was another basin would only be further wasting my time.
Things settled for a minute or two and the head scrubbing began again in earnest as the kettle began to boil noisily in the background. Things were not to remain calm. Moments later my twelve year old abuser screamed and ran to the doorway shouting 'look at the cup' look at that cup'!! Shampoo girl immediately stopped shampooing again and I struggled from my unnatural position....we looked at the cup, yes, sure as eggs is eggs it was a cup, white, pot thing with handle, hanging on a mug tree...we were at a loss to know exactly what it was we were supposed to be noticing.....twelve year old enlightened us rapidly in a near hysterical tone before running out of the room completely, all thoughts of my coffee forgotten. The mug was swinging gently in its place,now to you or me this might seem not to be a point of note but apparently we would be very wrong for twelve year old was utterly convinced that this was a case of the paranormal.....that the mug was swinging entirely unaided, there could be no other explanation than she was in the presence of a ghost...there would of course be no possibility that she had knocked it, it being in close proximity to the kettle and her other antics! She would not be convinced and remained dithering in the doorway .......Ok, so enough already with as much calmness in my voice as I could muster I reminded shampoo girl that I was still dripping infront of her, informed her that a second lathering and conditioner would not be required and please, could she just get this stuff off my damn head and let the lady with the scissors at me!
She dared to look slightly affronted at my tone but at last did the necessary and released me from my torture! Oh.... and the coffee never did materialize but I thought better of risking a repeat of that debacle again!
Surely, just one time I can pay a visit to a hairdressers and it be simple....yup, paranoia is definitely beginning to set in!
Please note: gratuities were not bestowed!....but I have pre-empted the usual requests for a picture of the result this time. ;oP
Friday, 12 May 2006
Birth control in methadone?
I'm sorry if it offends anyone but I agree with this, the suggestion of Scottish M.P. Duncan McNeil, that birth control drugs be added to methadone.
I'm sure there will be those out there that start making noises about civil liberties and freedoms but what about the rights of the child.... and of the mother for that matter? The effects of methadone, or it's street equivalent, on a foetus, both long and short term are all too obvious but the mother herself is likely to encounter a difficult pregnancy when she is least able to cope and subsequently be unable to take proper care or responsibility for any child. I'm far from unsympathetic toward those fighting any addiction, quite the contrary but this is obviously not a permanent method of contraception, just a sensible one....albeit probably unpopular!
I'm sure there will be those out there that start making noises about civil liberties and freedoms but what about the rights of the child.... and of the mother for that matter? The effects of methadone, or it's street equivalent, on a foetus, both long and short term are all too obvious but the mother herself is likely to encounter a difficult pregnancy when she is least able to cope and subsequently be unable to take proper care or responsibility for any child. I'm far from unsympathetic toward those fighting any addiction, quite the contrary but this is obviously not a permanent method of contraception, just a sensible one....albeit probably unpopular!
As someone....
....who abhors all things football related the amusement in this is obvious....though it might be lost on those of you over the pond I'm afraid.
Click to see readable version.
Click to see readable version.
Thursday, 11 May 2006
Wednesday, 10 May 2006
The real opportunities in life
Life isn't too simple in gemmak's-ville right now, it's one of those times when you kind of assume you're living through this bit just so you can appreciate the good bits, well that's the best theory I can come up with but maybe for the first time in my life rather than merely moan and winge about my troubles I am realising that these 'less than ideal' times in life are an opportunity to learn and to maybe grow a little. An opportunity to see inside, to try and understand better what motivates and shapes us and to understand better, life from the point of view of others.
We go through life just 'living' for the main, we are so absorbed with our day to day lives, the routine, the myriad things we have to do and to fit into our busy days we barely have time to step back and really see what counts, what matters....and what matters isn't the big house, the impressive shiny car on the drive, the salary to die for....ok, so those things are nice but they come at a high cost to other aspects of ourselves and our lives and for me the cost isn't worth the gain.
What matters are the apparently smaller but in reality much larger things, the things that touch our soul, not our egos, kindness, caring and understanding, taking time to really listen to someone else, really hear what they say, taking time to notice the sunshine, to feel the rain to reach out and not remain locked in our own little sphere of reality, oblivious to what is outside of it, too busy to really see.
And friends, in difficult times the old adage 'you know who your friends are' becomes patently clear, those that are fair weather friends have rapidly 'done the off' in the less than perfect times of our lives but these are the moments when we have the opportunity to discover those people around us that are truly our friends, those that will be there no matter what. Friends that will let us ramble on about our troubles regardless of the fact they would sometimes prefer to beat us over the head for our stupidities, those that take the time to ask if we are 'OK' and to listen or see beyond the polite 'yes thank you' response we trot out as a matter of habit and course.....those that accept us for the person we really are, not the public veneer others see....those that care without judging but are strong enough to kick ass if we need it.
So things might not be utterly hunky dory in gemmak's-ville these last few weeks but in a contrary way I am richer for it, for I am lucky I have those friends, some of them people I never expected to be such an important part of my life but who have hung in there with me despite everything, they know who they are and I hope they know just how much I appreciate that they tolerate having me in their lives.
I thank you.
We go through life just 'living' for the main, we are so absorbed with our day to day lives, the routine, the myriad things we have to do and to fit into our busy days we barely have time to step back and really see what counts, what matters....and what matters isn't the big house, the impressive shiny car on the drive, the salary to die for....ok, so those things are nice but they come at a high cost to other aspects of ourselves and our lives and for me the cost isn't worth the gain.
What matters are the apparently smaller but in reality much larger things, the things that touch our soul, not our egos, kindness, caring and understanding, taking time to really listen to someone else, really hear what they say, taking time to notice the sunshine, to feel the rain to reach out and not remain locked in our own little sphere of reality, oblivious to what is outside of it, too busy to really see.
And friends, in difficult times the old adage 'you know who your friends are' becomes patently clear, those that are fair weather friends have rapidly 'done the off' in the less than perfect times of our lives but these are the moments when we have the opportunity to discover those people around us that are truly our friends, those that will be there no matter what. Friends that will let us ramble on about our troubles regardless of the fact they would sometimes prefer to beat us over the head for our stupidities, those that take the time to ask if we are 'OK' and to listen or see beyond the polite 'yes thank you' response we trot out as a matter of habit and course.....those that accept us for the person we really are, not the public veneer others see....those that care without judging but are strong enough to kick ass if we need it.
So things might not be utterly hunky dory in gemmak's-ville these last few weeks but in a contrary way I am richer for it, for I am lucky I have those friends, some of them people I never expected to be such an important part of my life but who have hung in there with me despite everything, they know who they are and I hope they know just how much I appreciate that they tolerate having me in their lives.
I thank you.
Tuesday, 9 May 2006
A little respite for you all.....
....from my inane ramblings for today. I am suffering another of those where you will be spared, courtesy of my oft times dysfunctional mind that cannot for the life of me think of anything to blog! I am up to my eyes (that's not a complaint incidentally, quite the reverse) in design stuff and I have one or two other distractions dragging me from any vestige of sensible thought....so that's it, expect nothing more from me but this, for today!
Sorry and all that. ;o)
*EDIT:
For Karen B. because she asked.....
'Afternoon nap' by Tilly!
Sorry and all that. ;o)
*EDIT:
For Karen B. because she asked.....
Monday, 8 May 2006
Slow Dance
Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,"Hi"
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.
I heard this on the radio driving home from work yesterday evening. it was written by a young terminally ill girl in New york and is featured here, it's message needs no explaination from me but that we could heed her words more often bears thought.
Sunday, 7 May 2006
Saturday, 6 May 2006
Friday, 5 May 2006
Muppet!
Because I always follow instructions! not
| You Are Scooter |
 Brainy and knowledgable, you are the perfect sidekick. You're always willing to lend a helping hand. In any big event or party, you're the one who keeps things going. "15 seconds to showtime!" |
Eeeekkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!
That's it, I remember why I love winter so much, it's not the snow, it's not the beautiful frosty mornings....it's because of the lack of spiders!
So here I am, just gone midnight, minding my own business, chilled and thinking of pottering off to bed when I see 'something' on the wall about two foot from my face. I'm seeing things I think to myself, I'm getting tired...I do a double take...I am not seeing things...there, just feet from my face is the biggest, most horrible spider I have seen in years, eeekkkkkkk...that's it, in an instant I'm gone shrieking into the hallway shouting to PG to 'attend to it', and most certainly not lose it....for should such a gargantuan specimen get 'lost' in the house I would most definitely not be going to sleep tonight! Ok....so still eeekkkk'ed out it's unlikely I will anyways but at least now it's safely 'dispatched' I'm in with a change...once of course I have checked the bed for further infiltrators.
F**k! I hate spiders, I mean really hate them, no I mean really, really, really hate them, more than anything ...I'll never get a grip of it...it's only damn well May and the first was a monster....can I have winter back now please?
Eeeeekkkkkkkkk!
So here I am, just gone midnight, minding my own business, chilled and thinking of pottering off to bed when I see 'something' on the wall about two foot from my face. I'm seeing things I think to myself, I'm getting tired...I do a double take...I am not seeing things...there, just feet from my face is the biggest, most horrible spider I have seen in years, eeekkkkkkk...that's it, in an instant I'm gone shrieking into the hallway shouting to PG to 'attend to it', and most certainly not lose it....for should such a gargantuan specimen get 'lost' in the house I would most definitely not be going to sleep tonight! Ok....so still eeekkkk'ed out it's unlikely I will anyways but at least now it's safely 'dispatched' I'm in with a change...once of course I have checked the bed for further infiltrators.
F**k! I hate spiders, I mean really hate them, no I mean really, really, really hate them, more than anything ...I'll never get a grip of it...it's only damn well May and the first was a monster....can I have winter back now please?
Eeeeekkkkkkkkk!
Thursday, 4 May 2006
Free summer idea for chavs
As every chav knows it's time to get ready for that all important cooking technique of the summer......outdoor grilling! I have found several stores where you can get a FREE Bar-B-Q Grill! This is not a joke. You can get a free BBQ grill from any of the following stores:
Morrisons, Lidl, Asda, Netto, Woolworths and Iceland.
I especially like the higher shelf which can be used for keeping things warm!
Morrisons, Lidl, Asda, Netto, Woolworths and Iceland.
I especially like the higher shelf which can be used for keeping things warm!
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