'Jane-world'

When he who decided that I wasn't for him dumped me so unceremoniously almost a year ago now, one of the accusations he hit me with at me at an increased decible level was that I lived in 'Jane-world' (my real name for those confused). This was by no means a positive thing in his opinion, the suggestion very much being that there was something 'inherently wrong' with Jane-world.

My first thought was 'no shit', of course I do, we all live in our own little corner of the world emotionally and psychologically to some degree, we are who we are, we can modify that, we can try and learn from our mistakes but ultimately we are all individuals, with our own personality, thoughts and beliefs but as time went on and I struggled through the hurt I began to be concerned that maybe there was something somehow 'wrong' with Jane-world.

It's taken me some time but slowly I have realised that actually there isn't! Jane-world may have had more than perhaps it's fair share of ups and downs recently, it may not be perfect, I might be a little no pun intended individual, I might not always get it right by a long chalk and I might not be a success as some people judge it but I am who I am, the good and the bad and there is nothing 'inherently wrong' with that, it is just what it is and perhaps my stubbornness (for want of a better word) not to lose myself and become something someone else wanted me to be was perhaps the real issue.

Jane-world may have it's pretty crap bits here and there but if nothing else it's honest, it's upfront, it's learning to love life and I even kind of like it from time to time (thought by no means all the time.)

Most of all I hope it never tries to undermine another's confidence and self belief in the manner that original accusation did mine!