The annual tussle

This morning I was forced from in front of this machine at an unearthly hour to make the annual trek to the local vet, two cats in tow, for the much hated booster jabs.

This is not a favourite trip as you might imagine, both for myself or for small cat and big puss. As ever the trip is preceded by the annual tussle to prise both into detested cat carrying contraptions. We have a well honed method, whilst PG holds said carrier in mid air I eject required cat from a faux-cuddle and into the opening, there is nowhere for cat to go, nothing to stand on and it is my proven method of operation. It is usually a succsessful method, however, whilst Poppy generally acquires a sulk on her face but obliges Ditto this morning adopted the 'spread eagle cat' position and required almost unending maneuvering of various limbs to complete the task in hand. Finally, a few scratches and much hissing and spitting later, she was suitably incarcerated, scowly faced, and the 5 mile drive began. This was, it goes without saying, accompanied by the expected duet of howling and wingeing.

Things began to go further downhill upon arrival, we discovered that our 'you don't need an appointment just turn up, vets' had evolved into the 'you do need an appointment' setup. We plead ignorance and I did my best 'oh please just this once' face and 'Mr very kind cat doctor' agreed to take the now silent and jammed into the back of their carriers cats, there and then. Things were looking up.

It was Ditto's turn first and having played merry hell whilst we tried to get her into the box she now dug her heels in and of course wasn't for coming out. No surprise there then! She was consequently ejected unceremoniously and was prodded and poked in the usual manner, her heart listened to and pronounced in excellent health, the feared needle was inserted neck-ward and she made her escape, this time with absolutely no protest, headlong back into the previously hated box.

The came Poppy's turn. This is the bit I dread. At almost 18 years old and already with failing kidneys I just know I am going to hear medical information I do not want to. Her heart is good, her lungs excellent but her kidneys have deteriorated further, she is now showing signs of dehydration and her weight loss is more pronounced. Hell, I know these things, I can see them for myself I just hate to have them confirmed by a professional!

We discussed my 'non intervention' decision of last year and it was agreed it was still the kindest route but the reminder that she is not immortal and that 'things are progressing' is not something I want to listen too.


She received her hated jab, made appropriate growling sounds and fled like a kitten back into her now considered safe, carrier amid warning from the vet that having just paid for a years protection it would be appreciated by all if she could possibly see her little way to making use of at least a fair proportion of it!

So now I'm sat here, heavy hearted, knowing the inevitable will happen probably sooner rather than later and questioning my non intervention decision. I always do this. In my heart I know that to feed her a special and likely hated diet, to stop her drinking her milk and to no longer feed her a myriad of tidbits is not the way to go, that to allow her to carry on happily as she always has is the right route and to let her enjoy whatever time she has remaining....... but right now the temptation to do all the 'life prolonging stuff' is hard to resist. I know though that ultimately to put her through nasty food, more vets visits and more prodding is no joy for her, merely my wanting to hang onto her as long as possible and that at 18 it's not fair, in the end her life would likely only be extended by a few months and they would be less happy months for her, so I'll stick to my guns, but this time I very carefully didn't ask for timescales, last time they said a few months, that was almost a year ago and I don't want to know now, what will be will be.

Why do cats with kidney failure so adore all the high protein foods that do them the most harm?! Gah.

*Sniff*