A wolf in sheeps clothing

Ok, so when we take to the shower it is generally to shower is it not? I accept that this modern convenience may on occasion be used for other purposes, you will understand here that I have that information only as hearsay not through any experience of my own!

Add to that my understanding that Cussons Imperial Leather shower gel is manufactured purely as a cleansing agent and you will begin to understand my confusion one morning last week when I made haste to the bathroom to carry out my daily ablutions.

My mother, God love her, had left sitting temptingly in the corner of the shower an innocent enough looking bottle of shower gel, specifically
'Imperial Leather Ice'. A refreshing looking substance if ever I saw one.....for it was refreshment I was after having indulged in far to late a night on the previous evening.

Refreshment of the kind I was looking for was a far cry from what I got! You see, whether this was a manufacturing fault or whether in fact Cussons have decided to give Anne Summers a run for their money I now question.

We are all (aren't we?) familiar, if only by advertisement *she says innocently* with the 'apply in certain areas for an exciting sensation' products marketed by our less family orientated manufacturers but one does not expect for an innocuous company such as Coussens to be dishing out such merchandise.

The aforementioned 'Ice' shower gel it seems, contains some form of mint or menthol product, presumably to impart to it's user the 'invigorated' sensation so much advertised.....well believe you me (and I have to choose my words very carefully here for fear of offence) 'invigorated' is not quite the description I would have chosen! Hells bells and little fishes.......I know not if this was a batch with an over zealous amount of the menthol product mistakenly added but this stuff has more in common with some of those Anne Summers substances than ever it does with soap, !! Be warned ladies....and likely men, if all you want in your shower is to get clean...this is not the product you want and I advise you, think very carefully about where on your body you choose to apply it!

This stuff is lethal....or amazing, depending on your point of view.

I could regale you with further detailed warning but I think it best I quit now while I'm ahead and some degree of dignity and decency still remains....albeit hanging on a very fine thread!

And crafted especially for.......

....The Tate Modern, just in case you missed this artwork in comments, I give you *insert virtual drum roll* an exclusive preview of...............

Fletch's take on Chihuly!


Too funny!

Chihuly 'Sun'

Ok, so I am a little obsessed with this Chihuly stuff right now but I couldn't resist just one more set of images, this time of 'The Sun' (link requires Quicktime player) the center piece of the Kew exhibition........ amazing!

(Images clickable)

Apologies....

....for the apparent break in service here, my hosts server seems to have gone 'toes up' temporararily and consequently I am image-less....still maybe you like the clutter free look :o)

With luck and a little 'finger pulling out' at the hosts end things will return to naormal soon.

The chair

No....not Van Gogh's version, nothing as high brow I'm afraid, rather an issue I am currently having with one small cat, namely of course that cat is Ditto.

There is not much in this flat that is good quality, most of the furnishings are Ikea, which whilst it is good value for money and suits our taste it is hardly the stuff of Chippendale, cabinet makers not male strippers.


However, given the amount of time my rear end is planted firmly on the computer chair it was decided long ago to invest in something reasonably well made and in nice squishy leather. Said chair is big, cozy and the favoured seat in the house by all who visit, assuming as is rare, that I am not already in situ.

Ditto has other ideas and has recently decided it is her favoured spot, not good enough that she already inhabits a brand new chair that has in two years rarely had the opportunity to hold a human rear end or that she treats the 'people bed' as a 'Ditto bed'....nope, now the computer chair is now also her domain (no pun intended).

She has long since destroyed the leather on the back of the chair giving it her own special 'distressed' look by constantly flexing small claws upon it as she climbs to a perch at the top of the back, wobbling precariously but now she has advanced to what she feels is her true right....a place on the seat no less!


This started with her beginning to immediately appear should I vacate the position, she would suddenly spring from out of the blue and land herself in the

favoured spot the moment it was free! Things have advanced somewhat since then and she now considers it appropriate to 'share'. The term 'share' in this context really means that all day and night long, should she not be out hunting and butterfly chasing, she ferrets herself between my rear end and the back of the chair and then surreptitiously spreads herself out until yours truly is perched rather inelegantly on the front two or three inches!

No amount of shuffling backwards, sitting on her tail or forcible removal works....she remains, staunch in her belief that it is indeed her chair!

Perhaps I should teach her to master HTML and she could then complete that takeover!

(Images clickable)

Dontcha just love it.....

....when someone deservedly gets a great big dollop of egg squarely in the face!

I made mention of an incident on the tube whilst we were in London last week that amused me highly, that incident involved the utter humiliation of another passenger. Now I'm not usually one to laugh at the misfortune of others but this guy was a very suitable candidate and no guilt or self reproach was felt for my uncontrollable laughter at the time.

Having spent the day marveling at the diamonds at the Natural History Museum we had made our way to Baker Street station for journey home. As soon as we entered the tube and sat down it was evident that we had parked ourselves in seats adjoining what can only be described as 'less than elegant company'.

Sat on the opposite seats were two guys, perhaps in their middle twenties, both mixed race ( is that a pc phrase, my apologies if it's not) one untastefully clad in complete chav regalia and the other in garb that I am never quite sure of the name for but which consisted of a baseball cap, jeans that were barely hung on the guys hips and had the rear almost dangling on the floor behind him, a vest displaying his previously knife wounded torso, much horrifically garish 'bling' and a pair of extremely expensive training shoes.....that he had parked challengingly on the seat opposite him, directly below a 'please keep your feet off the seats' notice!

Ok, so my hackles were up already and unsure just how intimidated I felt I was considering my options where instructing him to remove his feet was concerned. As I considered my next move the two guys in question struck up a conversation in a barely decipherable language, yes it was English but a street gang version spoken extremely loudly and with attitude. Thes idiots knew they were causing offence but also knew they were intimidating and carried on with that insolent 'I dare you to take me on' intermittent glare in the direction of ourselves and other passengers.

My hackles were rising at this point beyond any level that their best efforts at intimidation would affect when the phone, constantly in the hand of guy number one rang. He was 'sporting' a hands free kit and proceeded to take the call at a volume best described without exaggeration as shouting. The conversation was again barely understandable with phrases including having to 'shake a few moves to make the dough' for whatever it was he was intending to purchase. No prizes for guessing what that was!

Now I could see my fathers blood beginning to boil, my mother trying very hard not to look decidedly uncomfortable and PG restraining himself from putting the guy up against the nearest carriage wall!

At this point the whole display began to fall spectacularly apart as over the P.A. system the station announcer announced the destination and stops for the train we were sat on waiting to leave. Idiot number two at this point realised that they were on the wrong train, something the rest of us were already aware of courtesy of guy number one telling his 'phone conversation' where and when he intended to alight, it was nowhere this train was about to go!

Man number two shot out of his seat shouting to man number one that they were on the wrong tube, who, still screaming into his hands free kit also made haste to depart....en-route to the closing doors he stumbled, righted himself, still shouting, and here is the hilarious bit, as he passed through the doorway his timing for one so cool was completely 'off' and he became amusingly, thouroughly stuck in the doors!

Oh the joy and hilarity. Now these doors usually reopen automatically should something become jammed in them but on this occasion for some unknown but very appropriate reason they did not! Suddenly 'Mr smart ass, too cool to move' lost all of his ability to intimidate as he flailed and swore against the contraption holding him fast in such an undignified manner!

Within a few seconds the doors caught up with the situation and released him but the damage was done, his pride was in tatters on the floor along with the headset that in the struggle had parted company with his head!......and how we all laughed in his now egg covered red face?!

If ever there was an appropriate incident of come-uppence this was it!

What a performance!

This is most certainly not a post about some wonderful West End stage performance or anything even nearing it, it is in fact about 'two cats' who should know better and who on the occasion of this recent holiday created mini mayhem between them!

Bear in mind here that Poppy in particular is a very well traveled cat indeed, she has done countless car journeys of hundreds and hundreds of miles and never been a moments trouble, Ditto for her part whilst not as widely ventured is more than well versed in the rules applied to car travel.

But nay, it was not to be, rules were not adhered too on this occasion and the whole 'cat in transit' issue consequently fell to pieces rather spectacularly last Sunday

PG was charged with the task of taking said cats to the cattery for their holidays whilst I was at work, thus enabling us to leave on our travels in the wee small hours. This is a much practiced 'carry on' though usually performed by the two of us as negotiating cats into boxes is not always without incident. Happily there were no incidents at this point in the the cat transport operation and both duly allowed themselves to be deposited on nice, clean, cosy bedding in their respective carrying equipment and off they all set.

Almost immediately things began to degenerate from there with Poppy deciding that now, in the close confines of PG's car, it would be a good time to hone her projectile vomiting skills and in her endeavors, created a new design of interior car design 'stippling'. The man was not amused but duly stopped the car, did the best job he could of a clean up operation and they continued on their way.

Barely was the engine running again than Ditto decided that not to be left out of the proceedings she would do her best to make the short journey memorable by making new use of her travel compartment in the manner of a litter box! There was little to be done and a rather less than amused PG was forced to drive the remaining miles with sun roof and all windows as wide open as he could get them! Eventually himself and said, now disgraced cats, arrived at their destination where 'very nice cat lady', full of sympathy for the cats, rather than PG's trauma, whisked them out of their various unpleasant surroundings and began the clean up process. Why does that happen? I have to admit to being just very slightly amused, PG doesn't 'do' animal nastiness where it can be avoided, rather leaving such tasks to yours truly and here, when I thought he would be forced into some action someone comes to his rescue, had I been there no doubt it would have been down to me!.

This was not to be the end of the cat troubles.

Home at last!
On Friday a good friend kindly offered, as he always does, to collect small furry creatures and deposit them home enabling us to arrive home late and therefore miss the traffic.

On Friday evening, still in London we received a phone call from 'very nice cat lady' saying she had retained Poppy for a further night whilst Ditto has been collected by aforementioned friend to be taken home. Given that in her elderly and less than well state I was already concerned about how Poppy would fare on her 'holiday' I immediately went into silent panic mode as PG took the call. When he eventually got off the phone I discovered that rather than being a panic situation it was a 'stubborn old cat' situation, Poppy in her annoyance at the whole malarky had refused point blank to be incarcerated in her travel box and no amount of gentle, or less gentle physical persuasion was going to budge her! Both our Friend 'L' and the cat lady are well practiced at this maneuver but nothing was going to beat old puss and eventually she began to hyperventilate causing a rapid cessation of all attempts to get her securely 'jailed'.

It was thus that we arrived home, as mentioned, to only one small confused cat in the small hours of Saturday.

Immediately we saw what the problem had been with Poppy. The carrier that Ditto had been 'packaged' in was the big one we have...... which meant that attempts at inserting Poppy had been into the smaller one, usually inhabited by Ditto. One has to understand the specifics of cat life here and know that Poppy just does not go in the small carrier, it is not an arguable point, it just doesn't happen, we know that, she knows that but it had never occurred to us to tell anyone else, we just assumed that as they arrive in that manner they would come home in that manner.

So yesterday morning we set off on the Poppy rescue mission, BIG box in hand, upon arrival we were met by verbal protestations uttered loudly in 'cat-eze' by 'someone' having been left behind an extra night, despite it being her own fault it suddenly became our fault! Her behavior had caused much amusement once she had stopped her overbreathing lark it seems, and much was said of her ability, despite declining health to dig her heels in when she chooses. She was duly and happily placed in her big box with no nonsense, and off we set happily homeward.

You thought that was the end? Well you are wrong! As a final act of defiance, this cat, who had traveled thousands of miles over her lifetime without any incident now, on this 15 mile journey decides that she must have the last word so to speak.....and followed Dittos lead of a few days earlier by making inappropriate use of her carrier as a litter box!!

Feisty old bag!

Five days of fun

Why is it that holidays seem to pass so quickly?

Having spent the small hours of Monday driving to London I recall on Monday evening saying to PG that the day seemed to have lasted forever, that was where 'forever' ended though it seems! Tuesday through to Friday shot by in a blur of hilarity, chatter, good food and days out......and then suddenly we were home again.

Monday was spent catching up with my parents, there was plenty to talk about of course as ever and the fact that we had not seen one another for almost six months made the possibility of unending gossip all the more likely! We ate, drank and talked into the early hours and fell into bed for a long overdue sleep.

Tuesday we mustered early and bleary eyed, set off for the tube and a day at the Natural History Museum.

(All images are clickable)

to marvel at the diamond exhibition currently showing. For anyone it was a stunning display but for me, with a lifelong passion for diamonds it was just out of this world, I wandered in a state of wonder for hours, rapt by the sights before me. I don't know quite what it is about these little pieces of carbon that so enthralls and fascinates me but something always has, there is just nothing to compare with the brilliance and fire of a flawless well cut diamond!

Ask anyone who knows me what the first thing I would do would be if I won the lottery and they will tell you I would buy a large, flawless diamond. In fact, when I inherited a sum a while back that's just what I did, ok so it wasn't a sum the size of a lottery win but the first day I had the money in my hand I bought a good quality stone! I just can't help but be absolutely captivated by them.

Having spent as long as we possibly could with diamonds in our eyes we pottered along Exhibition Road to the V&A for a quick look at the Chihuly chandelier that hangs in the foyer We had seen it on another visit a while back but with Wednesdays trip to Kew Gardens and Chihuly's installations there planned we decided to refresh our memories. The V&A installation still remains my favourite of those works I have seen for myself. Early evening and we made our way to Baker Street station and our homeward journey, we were witness to a very amusing incident whilst waiting for the train to depart the station but I will blog that another time.


Dinner on Tuesday night was to celebrate PG's birthday on Monday and we enjoyed probably one of the most scrumptious meals we have ever devoured at a little local restaurant of some note. It was one of those evenings that was just perfect, the food was excellent, the service just as impressive, the ambiance just the right balance of decorum versus 'al fresco' dining and of course the company was outstanding.....yes, my parents read this sometimes!

Wednesday was subject to a sudden change of plans to accommodate PG's feeling utterly unwell ( not a product of the previous evenings intake of food and alcohol I might add) and the small disaster that was the dishwasher suddenly deciding to 'give up the ghost'. While PG ailed in his bed a very nice engineer man repaired said indispensable item of kitchen equipment and by afternoon PG had improved enough to indulge in a little retail therapy.

In the evening I abandoned PG to the clutches of my parents while I set off for a long awaited 'girls night out' with colleagues and friends from times past when I lived in the South. We have tried on previous occasions to get us all together over the last four years but for one reason or another we had never managed it until now.I might add at this point that despite the possibility of it being otherwise we were all very well behaved, a little 'loud' maybe but hey, we had a lot of catching up to do! It was one of those evenings that just passed by in a flash, we had all worked together for years and years before I shot through unannounced to follow my heart to Scotland and I could happily have stayed chatting for hours and hours longer. There were none of the silent pauses, no uncomfortable moments one fears in these situations, we just all immediately slotted back into 'how we were' and I for one had a ball. It was just so good to spend time with friends who had been such a big part of my life for such a long time and who I hadn't seen for years.

It was odd but I never realised just how much I missed them all until I saw them again. Maybe the circumstances surrounding my departure and the fact of having a whole new life to build from scratch distracted me but now life has settled back down I realised just how much I had missed them. I must take this opportunity to thank 'P' for her efforts in making it happen.


Thursday we made our way to Kew Gardens, a favourite haunt of all of us at any time of year but particularly in the summer, though the sun we all wish for was so hot on this occasion that we seemed to spend much of our time racing from one shady spot to another in search of some relief from the heat. We were of course there on this visit specifically to enjoy the Dale Chihuly 'Gardens of Glass' exhibition which in the 'way of Kew' were scattered far and wide, nestling almost unnoticed among shrubbery in some places and standing tall and loud in others. These pieces of glass art are amazing, beautiful and some say almost disturbing at times and though I could only see beauty in them I could see the 'triffid-ness' at times.







The evening was spent in the garden in fading sunlight while we mastered the art of cuisine 'a la barbecue' and as night fell we chatted away our last full evening together.

Friday morning we set off for the local town and Waitrose. For those of you who do not know this emporium of food it is the very best in high street 'supermarkets' and as it's not a luxury afforded those of us North of the border we have to make the most of the opportunity and fill the car boot with culinary delights to take home......though I'm not sure that to entirely fill the boot was a good idea, once we had packed our luggage too there was barely room for us in the car and to have to unload and unpack £150's worth of foodstuffs at 4am when we arrived home is not to be recommended as a fun pastime!

My sister, her husband and my niecess arrived at my parents en-route from a holiday on the South coast late in the afternoon and things went a little pleasantly mad as all of us caught up together for the first time in a very long while.....and then it was time to leave on our overnight journey home.

Sad farewells were bid, promises of trying not to 'leave it so long' next time were made and off we drove onto a typically busy Friday night M1. The journey though as usual boring (would you believee that of 374 miles there is not one single turn, junction, set of lights or roundabout etc. for 350 of those miles) was uneventful and we finally staggered to our door at about 4am to be greeted by a rather confused and alone Ditto....Poppy remained in the cattery an extra night as a consequence of her display of somewhat stubborn behaviour when a friend went to collect them earlier in the day! More on that tomorrow!

And so that is it, another holiday over though I still have a week off work and of course I have my new connection to fully test!

Batten down the hatches......

....I'm back....your peace is shattered!

Arrived home 04.00 this morning had a few hours sleep, colleced 'old puss' from the cattery, Ditto arrived home yesterday.....long story.

Reality dictates that four loads of washing etc. need to be attended too and then it's time to play with this 2 meg connection!

:o)

Lots to Do This Weekend in Edinburgh

I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but Edinburgh seems to be the place to go in August. Of course, that would be a long trip from Omaha, Nebraska, US, or even for you, but just FYI...

The Edinburgh Festival is a generic term used to describe the cultural explosion in August each year.

Since the late 1940s Edinburgh has become a hotspot for artistic talent beginning with the International Festival and the Fringe. The summer programme has grown with the Edinburgh Book Festival, the largest book festival in the world, the Edinburgh Film Festival, a world renowned showcase of cinematic talent and the Military Tattoo in the magnificent backdrop of Edinburgh Castle. The Jazz festival starting in late July and the Edinburgh Mela in the last days of August bookend a phenomenal six weeks of arts and culture in the city. Hogmanay is the world's most famous celebration of New Year, the Edinburgh Science festival is a springtime journey of discovery in its own right and the Children's Festival starts the summer with playful exuberance.

It's no wonder that Edinburgh has truly become the FESTIVAL CITY.

Art Festival - £15,000 was awarded to 6 Edin galleries to fund marketing to fund development of new work for this year's festival.
Edin Military Tatoo - Many military groups/musicians have gathered in Edin for years to perform. You can find some video clips at the Tatoo Website.
Fringe - Outdoor music entertainment
International Book Festival - buy books or listen to authors. J.K. Rowling already appeared on August 15th, but you still have time to listen to author fascinating authors.

International Film Festival - For over half-a-century, the Festival has presented some of cinema's most important and exciting moments and played host to the world's greatest filmmakers.

So if you're interested in knowing what's going on in Gem-Land, check it out. If you're in the neighborhood, feel free to stop in at any of these entertaining events.

Homeward bound

It seems only a few hours since we arrived here at my parents and already it's almost time to return home. All that remains of our holiday now is a few hours with my sister and her family who take over the 'guest rooms' as we depart, an early dinner and then it's back on the road for another overnight drive, this time heading northward.

With a little luck and a decline in the torrential rain currently falling, we should make it back to Scotland at about 4am. Ugh. There is of course a silver lining to every cloud and on this occasion it is that Poppy and Ditto will be waiting for us when we arrive, having been 'rescued' from the cattery by a friend earlier in the day.

Normal service should be resumed tomorrow. :o)

More Chihuly

And here's another. I love Chihuly glass design. They come to our museum annually and give a demonstration and have several displays for us to view. Thanks for sharing, Gem!

Something strange.....

.....growing in a lilly pond, courtesy of Dale Chihuly, Kew Gardens installation.

If ever I coveted anything......

.... it is the Millennium Star! What the most beautiful thing in the world, over 203 carats of flawless sparkling stone, perfectly cut from a rough stone of originally 777 carats and sending a kaleidoscope of rainbow light to every corner of the room in which it is currently displayed within the Natural History museum. Worth over £200 million and at about 2 inches high by an inch in width it is one of the largest cut diamonds in existence and a thing of utter and beauty and perfection.

It is of course displayed along with hundreds of other stones and design pieces of particular note, an extremely rare red diamond, an even rarer orange diamond, blue diamonds and brown diamonds but none come anywhere near the breathtakingspectaclee of themillenniumm stone.

Security in gaining entry into this exhibition is understandably tight, the usual scanning with a detection device and emptying of pockets is obligatory but to be allowed access to this display it is also obligatory to 'hand over' ones handbag, mobile phone, PDA, camera etc. etc. for the duration of the visit, something I felt a little uncomfortable about but was in the end well worth any risk of loss. Hell, they could have had the whole shebang for good, just to be allowed the pleasure of being so close to that magical stone for a few minutes!

So what next on the agenda.Today'ss planned trip to one of my favourite places, Kew Gardens, has been postponed until tomorrow, PG having unfortunately fallen victim to some nasty bug that has caused havoc with his gastro-intestinal system.....the less details here the better...... and so this morning I am lazing in 27 degrees in the garden, will partake of a little retail therapy this afternoon and then this evening it's off on a 'girls night out' with friends and colleagues from my place of work when I last lived here. I can't wait, I haven't seen any of them for almost four years and there is a distinct possibility that things could become a little wild! :o)