It's good to talk

So, it's Friday again and it's seemed a long time in coming this week in some respects, though somewhere deep inside of me something has changed over the last few days and this week hasn't been quite as difficult as many that have gone before in recent months. Somehow the 'rawness' of my emotions seems to be salved a little.

Firstly there has been the 'niece distraction', and albeit I joke about the trials and tribulations of being an auntie and I wouldn't want a whole child, she has been fun, her company has distracted me from my current aggravations and it's just kinda nice to be with someone for whom life appears simple and who's immediate happiness depends on sweets, fun and lots of cuddles. I shall miss her when she goes, loath though I am to admit it.

Secondly I think my lighter mood can be put down to communication....it's good to talk,(why am I using a BT tagline? I hate BT!), it's good to really talk, to share one's greatest fears and concerns, to air grievances and try to find a deeper understanding of what makes ourselves and others function and react as we do. It is maybe rare to be able to be completely honest and open with others, to have an affinity that allows us to take the risk, take the final steps to make ourselves completely vulnerable, and it takes immense trust in one's confidante, for when we open ourselves up to others and dare to explore parts of our own psyche we don't usually, or prefer not too, acknowledge in ourselves, we are at our most vulnerable. It is hard, it hurts like hell and we don't always receive the answers that we want, but it is also calming to have our thoughts and feelings listened too, validated and to share our innermost fears....true communication is invaluable, a rare gift.

Yup...I think that's the word, 'calm', I feel a little calmer this week, I no longer feel quite like a headless chicken rushing about trying to take the world and it's wife on all at once, I have slept some, I don't feel quite so overwhelmed and now, add to that, it's Friday!.....and you know how I love Fridays.

Ok, so nothing has really changed, the practicalities and problems I face remain much the same but maybe, just maybe, my perception of them and of some of the situations I find myself in has changed some.

......things are looking up (she say's tentatively), long may it last! :o)


*Thank you for being there.......you know who you are.