Who are your friends?

I have been in my current position before, that is the position where I have made the decision to leave a partner and make a new life and one of the most striking aspects of being in that position is that one very quickly learns who one's real friends are.

It is human nature I suppose that when individuals find themselves standing on the perimeter of such a situation they feel a need to 'side' with one party or another, to 'fight the corner' of one or another of those involved, rather than to try see the bigger picture, think outside the box and look at all sides of a set of circumstances.

On both the occasions I have found myself in this situation, within days, despite my attempts at not turning anything into a battle, the statutory two 'camps' have formed and suddenly one is made very aware of those friends who will and those who will not continue to stand at one's side and offer support through thick and thin. Almost instantly there are some who were considered at least reasonably close friends, who feel it appropriate to judge a situation, often with only half information and overnight those people disappear into the mists of what once was.

There is of course an upside to this. As one trundles through life one learns there is not enough time to be wasted on friendships that never really where that, friendships that ultimately lacked depth, with friends like that who needs enemies as the saying goes, and whilst it can be sad in parts sorting the 'wheat from the chaff' it at least ensures we find within our circle of friends those who really care and those we care for in return.

The situation does not make me angry nor bitter, it just is as it is, it will always be human nature to a degree but for my part I hope, that on the occasions I find myself being the onlooker I can at least try to stand back a little and look for the bigger picture.

I am very lucky, I know who my true friends are, I know who I can count on and who I can trust but it is sad that in a situation such as that I am currently experiencing that any one individual has to be judged right or wrong, stuff happens, we make decisions to the best of our ability, they may not always seem right to another but do we have the right to judge others even when we are in possession of the facts, let alone when we aren't?