We are not amused!

Those of you familiar with my ramblings will know that despite probably even Outer Mongolia now enjoying internet connection speeds nearing the speed of light, I here, in this little corner of Scotland still suffer a dialup connection. No choice, there is no option, there is nothing else.

You will also be familiar with the fact that over the last two and a half years the date promised us for our very own high speed connection has moved more times than you can shake a stick at.

Last month yet again we had a new date, finally we thought we have made it...but no, we got to within ten days of 'lift off' and it was put back again. So, we re-started our countdown, we added the extra three weeks BT told us we were to wait and we waited patiently.

To within three days we got this time, yes, almost there, just three small days to go and we were home free........I doubt I need to tell you what has happened do I?

We checked the BT site last night to reassure ourselves that we were still on target and BT HAVE CHANGED THE BLOODY DATE AGAIN!!!!

Another three weeks we have to wait, we seem unable to get explanation from our wonderful suppliers of broadband of quite what the problem is, in fact we can get nothing but platitudes, so from now on I am going to think of this infuriating state of affairs from a different perspective.

Hell....what do I want or need broadband for, this is not a big deal, I have a connection, I should be happy with that. Aggravated......me? why no, I have all the time in the world Mr. BT. Hey, I am happy to sit here and upload a website over a four hour period, your in convenient two hour breaks in service allow me time to make a cup of coffee, how thoughtful of you. Napster...what's napster, ah yes, just 20 minutes a track and good Lord, my very favourite time of the day, I wouldn't miss it for the world, you see I do so enjoy the half hour wait for for my mail to download, only to discover my ISP killed my mailbox half way through and requires me to complete another half an hours work to get it reinstated!!

So next time feel free, when you send me an 18 meg mail knowing how I love my dialup (yup, someone really did that to me), to laugh your socks off while you think of me stranded interminably in download hell!

Broadband...pah...what do I need broadband for?