I have a friend......

........ or at least I hope I do, someone I didn't expect to become a friend and someone who has appeared in my life from out of nowhere.

This person, I will call them 'T' for now, is at an important crossroads in their life, one where big decisions having to be made will have repercussions for the remainder of their life.

I feel for 'T', the decisions and subsequent actions that need to be taken have been harshly bestowed upon young shoulders and are some of the most difficult in life so far, a life that has of late not been much fun and has been a hard learning curve.

It is difficult from my perspective, I am older, I know the pitfalls, I have that blessed thing called 'experience', I can see the route to success but I can't force actions upon my friend.....those have to be individual choice, if they are not then the executing of them will not be from the heart and without conviction will be so much harder to face, to carry through.

I want to shake 'T', to shout, to be able to look hard into their face and challenge them not to fail but I can't.....it is not for me to take that responsibility, it is 'T's own responsibility not to take the wrong road.

When I was younger I remember vividly thinking that all advice offered to me by someone with 'experience' and 'over 30' was crap, what did someone 'old' know about my problems? How did they know how I felt? they where after all 'old', they had no idea!.....Oh, the naivete and arrogance of youth.

'T' may well view me with such skepticism, disregard my thoughts as ramblings of an old git..... and that is my fear. Watching 'T' struggling with the choices on offer is hard, it's frustrating, the wise option is obvious to an old git such as me, one route is wrong and one right, life is very rarely black and white but in this instance it is! There is only choice. it is a hard choice but it is an important and life changing one.

I am not often moved to try and influence another's life, I am as a rule given to the belief that another's life is their own responsibility but on this occasion something has got to me about 'T' and where they go from here on in is critical.

'T', I think you know who you are, this 'old git' is looking you hard in the eye and challenging you to make the right decision. You know in your heart which route to take.

Good luck my friend.